In today's lesson you have been introducing/describing a character from the supernatural thriller genre in a way that leads your reader to think that there is something not quite right about the character.
1) Comment on this post with your description from the lesson.
2) Comment on another post by one of your class mates with what you think the character might be or what you like about the description.
Due: Monday 2nd Decemeber
Here is my example from the lesson again for you.
ReplyDelete“He’s been here for years, part of the furniture. Oh here he is now, he’s been dying to meet you” she said.
The man walked towards us with a stiffness in his legs, dragging one leg slightly so his shoe scuffed along the ground. He slowly lifted his hand to shake mine. I could see dirt under his finger nails and his pale skin was cold to the touch.
Good luck Mr Brown
Tall, thin with huge circular glasses. His face with wrinkles on it he had grey hair and a brown wooden stick to hold him up. He was crouched down like he had a huge shell on his back. He looked like he was in his 60s. He put his head up and gave me an evil grin.
ReplyDeletehi Ikrah was your character a ghost because he had grey hair and wrinkles....i liked the similie you used where it says 'huge shell on his back'because that is a good way to describe how he is hunching over and how much he is
Deletesonia
Ikrah
ReplyDeleteHi Ikrah! I really like the simile you have used "huge shell" to describe how the creature moved and also the creature's posture! Also I really like the ending-it makes me inquisitive and curious about the characters personality- it's also a strong memorable ending!
ReplyDeleteFATIMAH HAMZA :D :D
Hello my name is Herr Howl, I'm Mrs Devrills brother. Hair coverd his hands like hairy gloves. He stayed in the 5 room dowm from were I am. Laast night I heard a howl but I don't know who It was. Was It Herr Howl?
ReplyDeleteBailey
Mrs Def had cold pale white skin with a sharp evil smile. Her eyes were shockingly blue and she had jet black hair that looked like coal and was rarely washed but still looks pristine. She had rose red lips. Mrs Def had lived in this house for years and years on end but looked really young- probably about 20- and when ever she saw young children she would look at them in a freakishly manor and say "I wish my blood was young and-" well at that point in time she mumbled something under her breath and I could never understand what she was saying.
ReplyDeleteSerena Joyce 7A
Bailey, I like your use of rhetorical question- was it Herr Howl?
ReplyDeleteSerena Joyce 7A
Speedily, she raced around the cobbled bendy roads - twisting and turning abruptly. Her large pointy toes popping out of her normal sized sandals. She had reached her destination...
ReplyDeleteThrusting her wrinkly old hand out of her camouflaged gloves, she tediously pushed the colossal heavy door. However it didn't budge. Without any hesitation she tried to force the door open." Umm urrr ooooo come on open you stupid door!" She yelled furiously. "You alrigjt miss cackleton?" Chirped a young teenage boy.
THIS IS ONLY A QUARTER OF MY DESCRIPTION!
FATIMAH Hamza
Hi Fatimah.I really liked the sentence: Thrusting her wrinkly old hand out of her camouflaged gloves, she tediously pushed the colossal heavy door.
DeleteKati Holland
So do I Kati, but what do you like about it in particular?
DeleteMr Brown
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteMr Vamps was a school teacher at Langley Grammar School. He was very unusual because he would always disappear and come back with blood all over him. He would never turn up on picture day either He was also very pail and he would hurt all the children in P.E when throwing a ball. Everyone assumed he was a vampire but no one asked if he was. He would also win all the running races against all the other teachers as well. He started missing some time off of work. One day he disappeared completely .........
ReplyDeleteBy Jade
Hey Jade, I think your character is a vampire because you mentioned blood and his name was Mr Vamp like VAMPire
Deletehey Serena I liked it when you said her hair was like coal.
ReplyDeletelast one as by Jade
ReplyDeleteSploon ,the clown is the name. He is always wearing a afro with many colours like light blue, light green ,and red , they are just some of the colours .He wears one of the outfits that clowns wear .His best features is making animal type balloons . this is how he does it ,sploon asks the children to say the magic word which gets him the power to make the balloons
ReplyDeletehumara majid 7A
Hi Jade I think Mr Vamps is a vampire because he never turned up on picture day and when he came back he was covered in blood.
DeleteBy Hibah Tahir
I liked how Serena said sharp evil smile
ReplyDeleteHumara Majid 7A
Hi Bailey, i think it is a werewolf. I like the simile you used ' Hair coverd him like hairy gloves.
ReplyDeleteAnika
There was a chill in the air as he entered the room. He smiled at me, it wasn't a nice smile. It was one that would send shivers down your spine. His skin was pale and withered like old leather, his legs were long and spinally and they looked as if they might snap any second. On top of his head sat a thick greasy black mob of hair, it was clear that he hadn't washed in days. I tried not to look him in the eyes, but he waved his twig-like fingers in my direction revealing..... a sixth finger on his left hand!
ReplyDeleteMillie Lewthwaite-Page
I like the way how Millie said the character smiled, but it wasn't a nice smile!
DeleteAlisa Akhtar 7A
Milly, I like the way you ended your paragraph with, "A sixth finger on his left hand! it makes your character interesting, it draws your reader in.
DeleteShreya
Hi Fatimah,
ReplyDeleteI liked when you said she thrust he wrinkly old hands out of her camouflage gloves.
It was a nice use of descriptive words.
Millie Lewthwaite-Page
The inspector looked around for a moment and when he looked back Mr Peer was already across. He had been standing in front of the inspector before he turned his head. No one could run that fast.
ReplyDeleteKirsten Walker
Is it a Vampire, because Vampires can run really quickly
DeleteJess
Hi Millie
ReplyDeleteI liked the bit where you said his skin was pale and withered like old leather.
Kirsten Walker
bailey i think it is a were wolf because there was a howl
ReplyDeleteIkrah
We were on our way in Mrs Poosky's run down car. She had a short plump body and every time she breathed she snorted like a pig. " We are almost there." She said with a snort.
ReplyDeleteWe approached a derelict house it was unfortunately Mrs Poosky's house. As I walked through the wrecked front door over the creaky floorboard which led into the kitchen I was guessing, but the thing that caught my eye was a peculiar blue bottle labelled embalming fluid! The first isolated word that came into my head was yuck! There is something wrong with her and I want to find out why!
Alisa Akhtar 7A
She wore black heeled shoe, that were only just visible beneath a ugly black dress. A scarlet shawl was draped over her shoulders and long crimson nails clasped a clutch bag. white wispy hair tumbled down her back. When she saw me, her face split into a wide smile, revealing a set of unnaturally white teeth. Small beady eyes scanned her surroundings, rather like a vulture does as it scours the land for dead animals. I wanted to run, to get out of here, away from the creepy woman who was eyeing me with great interest. As I shuffled my feet, inch by inch away from her, I spotted a black cat lurking in the shadows of the woman. As I gazed at the cat, it turned its head to look at me, I let out a cry of horror and surprise. The cat had human eyes.
ReplyDeleteShreya
Bonie came running down the hard marble staircase and suddenly I heard someone say" I have been dying to meet you.".... her words mumbled away and I looked out of the window and I saw them standing round a grave, suddenly I realised they weren't who I thought. When they came back a boy was with them, he looked as though he got run over by a car, his skin was pale, he had loads of blood running down his face and his legs were slow to move.
ReplyDelete"Could this really (italic) get any worse?" Matt grunted under his breath - gritting his teeth - irritated, as a man (who to Matt looked to be about mid-fifties) started limping towards him. The middle-aged man looked badly wounded - a weeping gash sliced across his left cheek, shimmering in the dull light; barely any teeth - and what he did have left were all brown; and a amputated arm. Matt, now trying to avoid making any eye contact with the man, went from a brisk walk to a vigorous run towards his bike. He did not care if he looked suspicious.
ReplyDelete"Brai - Brian! Brian?..." The man sounded unsure of what was coming out of his mouth. He sounded out of breath - fatigued, as he said it, the dark bags under his eyes drooping sadly. One of them - particularly saggy - had red around the rim of the eyeball, slightly bulging out of it's socket.
i think jess's description of a character is of a zombie
by lauren power
"I hope I'm not intruding"
ReplyDeleteA tall thin figure was standing in the doorway, silhouetted against the glow of the street lights.
"Ah," Said Mary, smiling to her self, "This is Clarence Macabre, he has heard so much about you."
Clarence fixed me with an eerie grin, his frizzy scarlet hair a shocking comparison to the paleness of his face.
"Good evening"
Up close I could see that his skin was not real ,but something like a mannequin or a marionette.It was pure white and plastically flawless, like he was wearing a mask. His eyes were two completely black full stops on his face. They were gradually widening. I did not want to look directly into them. He held out a gloved hand for me to shake, his fingers were needle like and spindly, I looked up at his face. His smile was distorting andstreching like elastic reaching the tips of his ears.
"I'm sure we will get along just fine."
Hi ,Jessica: I liked it when the voice mumbled away (also I think she is a ghost :) )
Zonni came from the funeral of her cousin 2 years ago and she met me! She asked if we could be friends? I said I don't know but she shouted this time and demanded me to be friends. The I said ok ok you got to chill down! I took her with me to get my lunch from home I went inside then I came back and saw her arm the wrong way,it was completely twisted! I asked what happened but she turned around and on the other side of her arm their were blood drooling down her arm.
ReplyDeleteAnika Ali
THEN I said ok ok sorry my mistake
DeleteAnika Ali
Her name is Veronica, as she entered the room she stared at Matt non-stop. Matt was worried because now Veronica's eyes were flashing red, she was very pale.
ReplyDelete"Are you OK?" Matt asked her. Veronica was walking towards him."Help me?" Matt screamed. There was a laugh in the distance.
Hibah Tahir
Mr Thead was teaching his class as usual. He had jet black hair, pale skin and a tall figure. He would always sit in a dark corner of the class where no sun shone- maybe that was why he was so pale. Mr Thead felt hungry during his lesson.
ReplyDelete"I would die for a cheeseburger right now!" He mumbled to himself...
His pale white hands hovered in mid-air trying to help me up before i reached his pale hands i saw greenish mold under his finger nails.I hesitated.That Mold under his finger nails freaked me out.I got up and walked away.far far away from him ,his name was Liam,Liam Crimes He causes nothing but trouble no one is even dared to go near him.
ReplyDelete"OI COME BACK HEAR RIGHT NOW OR ELSE"
Without any warning i slipped into darkness.
Kati Holland
Her pale white face, jet black hair and bright red lips... she walked towards me i step back she yells my name "mat" "mat" it gets louder and louder i cant take no more! i run faster than i ever could.......
ReplyDeleteI was fixing my tree house when an old lady came up to me. she was wearing long white gloves, her eyes changed colour every time she blinked, she itched her head as if she was wearing a wig and she kept moving about as if she had squashed square shaped feet into pointed shoes. She offered me a snake but only if I came down but I didn't because I've heard stories of people offering children something but as soon as the children touch the women they either disappear or turn to stone. "Grandma! Grandma!
ReplyDeleteI think Shreya's discription is a vampire. I like the way you have discribed the character
I think shreya discription is a witch
DeleteMeggie stared helplessly out of the window her eyes gazing at nowhere-not really.
ReplyDeleteThoughts tumbled through her mind as she gazed at nothing then the penny dropped- Coincidence? Huh! She was a witness of her 'new parents' death and although she had only known them for two weeks and felt as if they had been part of my life forever. After being orphaned at three years old Meggie felt as if she would never be loved again-then it hit her Her first parents had a heart attack at the very touch of Meggie- Coincidence- The word rang through her head like a chineese gong boing! Then as Meggie closed her eyes the world turned red- then blue and Meggie fell on to the ground with a sudden thud....
I like the bit where it says Coincicence-The word rang through her head like a chineese gong, boing!
Delete